The heavens are wide open tonight.

It rained today. Really, I should say we had storms and torrential downpours. Saying that it rained simply does not do justice to the sheets of heavy rain that flooded the roads and left me hydroplaning all the way to work. Something more majestic must be said about a downpour such as that from this afternoon. So here goes:
The day was battered by whipping winds and drowning rains, soaking everything possible.
..Yeah. Just not feeling that. So it rained and it rained hard and eventually, AFTER I got to work and got inside, it stopped. So it goes.

I love the way the world is after it has rained hard and long and washed the film of stagnancy from everything. Greens are brighter. Everything smells clean. The air feels clean. I like storms- I like them a lot, actually. They energize me. I am both energized and weary tonight. I'm not exactly certain how I have managed both states, but I have. Eventually the storms cleared out, and as I was driving home from work, I was awed by the beauty of the stars all throughout the sky.

I could write about what the stars look like- like they were a blanket of stars, so thick I thought I might be suffocated or drown in them- but that has been written so many times before by so many different people. Any attempt to put to words the majesty of them with the use of cliches and oft used adjectives would demean the beauty of the night. The sky is dark- such a dark inky black as almost to seem impenetrable. And then, everywhere, are points of light. Stars. All shining at different rates, all projecting different light. I wonder at how many different galaxies I'm actually seeing, if somewhere out there someone like me is looking out at the stars from their view, thinking the exact same thoughts.

And looking at those stars, I feel small. I am reminded of how insignificant I really am in the world. How inconsequential the comings and goings of my daily life are. But I don't feel saddened or upset by this- this acknowledgment of others, that I am not the center of the universe, it feels good. It's refreshing. It's energizing. There is an entire world of small people, like me, out there. I don't think of them enough. I'm so caught up in myself and my own mess that it takes something spectacular, something bigger than myself, something majestic, to remind me of everyone else.

I've been thinking a lot about love recently- and not just romantic love, although that has been on my mind- and how freely I give my love. I don't love nearly enough- past baggage has me withholding my love. Prejudice has me withholding my love. And I can't help but wonder the difference it would make in MY life if I were to love more and judge less. I just finished a very good book that touched on this and I've had the idea in my head ever since. What would happen if I just loved? It might not change the world, but maybe, just maybe, it would change me.

So my goal is to love freely. I'm going to put aside the qualifications that I have built up inside my head regarding who I am willing to love, and I'm simply going to love people. Call it an experiment. With any luck, I'll have successful results to report.

The heavens are wide open tonight- exactly as I wish my heart to be.